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Its all in the Details



Recently I've been struggling with anxiety and fear. For a long time, I would be very anxious because of the thoughts that fear would spawn in my head. Everyone would tell me "Trust God, He's gonna take care of it." "Give it to God." Even Paul says in the Bible "Be anxious for nothing." And Jesus himself said, "Don't worry". Something that I've figured out.....not worrying is much easier said than done. For a little while (and sometimes it still is) it was really hard. I mean giving up control and trusting that someone else was going to take care of my problems? It goes against human nature...especially mine. I like to be in control, to know what's going to happen, how it's going to happen, when, where, and why it's going to happen...details I like to know the details.


But one of the things that God's been showing me over the past few weeks is that I don't need to know all the details, in fact if I knew the details, I would probably FREAK OUT!!!!! If I knew the end result, what/where I was going to be when God's plan for me is completed I wouldn't be able to put one foot in front of the other. I'd probably be like "I'm gonna do WHAT??? Do you realize who I am? What I'm capable of? It's not that! You've got the wrong girl for that job God. No, trust me I'm not gonna be able to do that. I can assure you." I can't know all the details now because I'm not READY for all the details. God reveals the parts of His plan for my life to me that He knows I can handle where I am now. My job is to trust that He knows what He's doing and everything that happens He's going to work into a beautiful story.


When I was in college (boy that feels weird to say), I wrote and directed five student films. During production for the last one, we had to film several small scenes for a larger montage sequence. Now by themselves the pieces we filmed were silly and didn't make much sense at all. And the actors would usually look at me with a skeptical look when I'd tell them what I needed them to do. I was constantly telling them, "Trust me its all gonna look great. I know what the end result is going to look like."

Fast forward to the premiere. After the screening, the actors acknowledged that I was right, all the stuff that felt silly by itself really worked in the grand scheme of things.


Just like a video editor takes the various pieces of seemingly unrelated footage and edits them together to tell a story, God takes the seemingly random and unrelated moments in our lives and forges them together to tell a beautiful story of redemption, grace, and love.


Final thought: I have to remember that I may not be capable on my own, but my God is more than capable. And if He is going to give me the task, He's going to give me all the tools I will need to complete it. And when it comes to my future, I may not know all the details, but God does, and while I can't say that I always trust Him ALL the time and that I never feel afraid (wish I could), I do know that He is watching me and taking care of me ALL the time.



"The One who called you is completely dependable. If he said it, he'll do it!" 
1 Thessalonians 5:24 (The Message)


"When everything was hopeless, Abraham believed anyway, deciding not to live on the basis of what he saw he couldn't do but on what God said he would do." 
Romans 4:18 (The Message)

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